As a child I used to experience nightmares as I am sure most children do.
I still have many strong memories of these ghastly experiences. Some of these
memories are more vivid than my recall of what I did last week. There was the
sinister tin man who had smoke blowing out of his ears. There was the eerie
amorphous face that used to really creep me out by whispering incomprehensible
words to me. I even had one horrible dream in which our house was robbed and my
family was slain. I became so terrified that I woke up to see if my family was
still alive. I ran to my brother's room and his bed was empty. Horrified that it
may have been real, I darted across the hall and found my parent's room was also
empty. At that point I was really traumatized. The lines between reality became
extremely blurred. Still in the grips of sheer panic, I ran downstairs to find
that my parents were sleeping on the couch, and after they soothed my fears they
explained that my brother was sleeping at a friend's house. "It was all
just a bad dream," they said.
Now that I have been working with my dreams for several years, I notice that
there has been a steady decline in the number of my nightmares. I rarely if ever
have them anymore. Luckily, I have been conditioning myself to use intense
emotions (especially fear) as a "dream trigger". If I am awake and
become extremely fearful or even extremely happy I perform a 'reality check' in
which I will scrutinize my environment to determine whether I am dreaming or
not. Dreams seem to have such intensity of emotion that in some cases this
intensity is rarely rivaled in our waking lives. Colors can become extremely
vivid and what might normally be perceived as 'no big deal' in our waking life
may become an extremely frightening experience in a dream. Luckily, this
emotional intensity in our dreams can be harnessed to provide an ideal way of
realizing that you are dreaming while you are dreaming.
When people find out that I am very interested in dreaming, many of them will
ask about nightmares or explain how they have the same recurring nightmare. I
will always explain that this is a good sign. It is something that can be used
to their advantage. Nightmares are not bad dreams. They are the perfect
opportunity to 'wake up' to the fact that you are dreaming and transform the
nightmare into something positive. As with most fears in general, fear exists
only in your mind. It holds power over you only because you believe that it is a
"real" threat when in fact the fear itself doesn't even exist anywhere
else but in your head. The robber who approaches you in the alley may be real,
but the fear of his approach is not real. It is a biological response that has
evolved to provoke a response: Fight or Flight. In our dreams the lines between
"reality" and "dreaming reality" become even more blurred so
it no wonder that any runaway fears can develop into major hysteria and often
transform one's dreams into nightmares.
By facing our fears when they pop up in our dreams we can learn more about
ourselves, develop enhanced self-confidence and increase our self-assertion.
Instead of training yourself to wake up during the throes of a horrid dream I
recommend not waking up and instead start training yourself to realize that you
are dreaming. Once you become lucid in the dream you will truly have nothing to
fear but fear itself. You cannot be harmed in your dreams, and even more
importantly, you can confront whatever it is that is scaring you. If it is a
huge menacing villain you can ask him why he is bothering you. I often find that
these intimidating foes will melt like butter and become your friends merely by
facing them. Telling them that you have nothing to fear and realizing that they
may be a part of yourself that needs attention and love can create profound
effects. Once you address them as such, they will often become friendly, or they
may transform literally from that 300 pound rabid gorilla into a smiling comrade
or long-lost friend.
In The Lucidity Institute's Newsletter, The NightLight, Fall 1990, Volume 2
number 4, there is a wonderful article that covers nightmares and the effects
caused by becoming lucid in your dreams. It states:
"In a questionnaire study of the dream experiences of 698 college
students, 81 percent of the 505 who said that they had had both lucid dreams and
nightmares reported that becoming lucid in a nightmare usually improved the
situation...Lucidity is about seven times more likely to make nightmares better
than worse."
From my experience this research is right on the mark. Not only is lucidity
an excellent way of dealing with your nightmares, but what is often overlooked
is the fact that nightmares themselves are an ideal vehicle for inducing
lucidity especially if you are prone to having nightmares. To set the
foundations for transforming your nightmares into lucid dreams, you can simply
meditate before bed and say to yourself, "If I become extremely scared or
if anything bad occurs, I will remember to realize that I am dreaming. In my
dreams I have nothing to fear because I cannot be harmed." For best results
you can repeat this mantra over and over before bed. Instead of counting sheep
you repeat this affirmation until it is the last thought in your head before
falling asleep. Along the same lines if you have a recurring nightmare you can
change the affirmation to match your bad dream. For example, you might say,
"The next time I am being chased, I will realize I am dreaming...." or
"The next time I am late for an important meeting, I will realize that I am
dreaming..."
With a little bit of practice and determination, we can all learn to make our
nightmares work for us. We can use them as dreaming cues to clue our awareness
into the fact that we are dreaming. Upon becoming lucid in our dreams we can
then take full advantage of the situation by consciously confronting our fears.
The beauty of dealing with nightmares in this way lies in the underlying
acknowledgment that nightmares hold no power over you. They are as amorphous and
insubstantial as the thunder from a passing storm in your mind's eye. There is
no such thing as an inherently good dream or an inherently bad dream. It all
depends on how you choose to deal with the situation at hand. If you believe the
fear is real, it will become real whether you are dreaming or wide awake. It is
our ability to confront and transform our fears in our waking lives and in our
nightmares that allows us to not become frightened when things go BUMP in our
minds.
Dream well,
Marc Vandekeere ^v^
http://how.to/luciddream
http://go.to/mindvoyages
http://come.to/dreamresearch
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